Well what can I say, it seems there’s a girly girl in me somewhere.
I’ve been through the beauty mangle today. I’ve had my hair straightened, which is some going cos I don’t have much, and I’ve had my lips painted and my eyes daubed. I think the make-up artist was pulling her hair out with me as I’m not used to someone attacking my eyeballs with a black stick and quite predictably I kept closing them and ruining her art work.
I had to wear ridiculously clingy, pastel “leisure wear” which sent my blood pressure rocketing but which also revealed a never before uncovered cleavage. I’ve never had so many photos taken of me, never smiled as much and never had so many ladies fussing and preening over my clothes and hair. I could get used to that. Nice to have someone popping over every now again to dab at my greasy brow with a powder brush.
If I don’t wake up soon and pull myself together I reckon I’ll have a boyfriend by next weekend.
We had to do a crappy fitness test as well. I say crappy because although it correctly identified my lung capacity as exceptional (ahem) it suggested my upper body strength was poor. Poor?! I could have bench pressed the guy who was testing us. How dare they say I’m weak? I’m hugely strong. That’s done my bonce in and I’m gonna have to borrow Deege’s Better Body for Men book.
I would like to say that this post marks the end of all discussion of a make-up and underwear slant but I have just picked up a parcel from the post office containing a miracle of scaffolding design by enell. I think this will warrant a post all of its own and my prediction is that there will be a Bushy Park pb on its way tomorrow courtesy of this great contraption.
Anyway how does one get rid of waterfproof mascara – I’m sure there’s some turps under the sink…….